Hi adoring and loyal fans! Geordi here. I would like to take this time to tell you about my new dominion.
First off, I am not sure how it happened, but somebody STOLE MY GRASS! I have only seen grass once here and that was when I was off at Christmas on a territory expansion trip. The trees were removed and placed in pots. I think they also stole the carpet ’cause that is gone too. If you have any clues about who stole my grass, please let me know so I can hunt them down and express my supreme displeasure. You will be rewarded.
My castle is at the top of an enormous mountain, so to get back and forth to the ground is a lot of work. This does keep me safe from my enemies, of which there are many. My enemies constantly try to goad me into battle, but such battles are not worth fighting when I already know I am supreme ruler. I can prove it! There is a large quantity of tiny humans who follow me around as I survey my territory. No other dog has so high a castle or so many tiny human followers chanting their name. My castle also has a balcony where I can spend time looking over my domain, so never fear—I’m keeping watch, always.
I think my mom is doing better. At least, she doesn’t take nearly as many naps as she used to. She can’t be too much better, though, ’cause she takes me to Bible study where I guard her life with my own. My parents call me a funny word, “chakai.” I asked my enemies in my domain and their parents call them that too. I wonder what it means? Probably “King,” though it could just be “Ruler.”
Finally, I would like to introduce you to my new best friend. I used to unmake the bed everyday while my parents were at school (it’s so much more comfy that way), and then one day an ALLIGATOR showed up! I love my alligator, we take lots and lots and lots and lots of naps together. He doesn’t talk much, but he must recognize my sovereignty because he lets me use him as a pillow.
Thanks for listening, humans! Until next time…